Simulated Content

Jam vs. Jelly

2008-09-18T13:37:00.000-07:00

Jam<>Jelly? The two sides weigh in.
(These two weren’t actually in a chat window with each other, I was just passing along messages between them.)

Me: Jillian says 'jam = boo, jelly = ooh'

Kevin: she’s a plebe
only plebes hate the real bits of fruit
or she can't spread well
which im not even gonna go into"

Jillian: If I wanted real bits of fruit, I'd eat some fruit
Like chunky peanut butter--why not just eat peanuts?
Jam is like failed jelly--they just got lazy while mashing

Kevin: jam cannot be touched by jelly
it’s a formless goop ball which was inspired by science fiction writer hendrence d. trails after seeing the movie the blob
and it has no texture, no seeds, it's fruit which had its soul sucked out by machines

Jillian: If jelly is fruit with a machine-sucked soul, what is jam? Fruit blessed with a jelly dressing
Seems like he's too good for jelly, but jam is not

Kevin: jam is the handmade beauty and hard labor + patience that only humans can produce. or do you want to lay down to the cyborg armies right now!?

Jillian: As if machines don't make things better? Yeah, I don't need that pace-maker, I want good 'ol fashioned man-power beating life back into my chest.
While I'm lying here dying, I'll have one last bite of jam, since I no longer fear choking on the bits of fruit.

Kevin: also jelly has added sugar and thats for dweebos
jelly comes in peanut butter and jelly in the same jar
what kind of atrocity is that
also jelly comes in a squeeze bottle
i feel like if i need to put anything else after that i already won.

Jillian: So ketchup, mustard, honey, personal lubricant, shampoo, body wash, vanilla-scented hand sanitizer...and so forth...are all worthless and not defendable?
Additionally, jelly comes in both squeeze bottle and jar form, for added variety
jam cannot be convenient and variable because of its chunky fruit shackles

Kevin: you can get all those things in non squeeze bottle form
and comparing lube and shampoo with things you put on toast
i think makes my case
jam is winnar

Jillian: Because they are all a part of our everyday, comfortable lives? Jam just hasn't caught up to the 21st century

Kevin: added sugar was still not addressed
jam would never lower itself to the plastic disposable world we've lowered our standards to dwell in. and my hand sanitizer and shampoo comes with pump tops. if you want to pump jelly onto your toast. thats your decision
i can't stop you but i DID warn you

Jillian: To condemn anything based on its added sugar content is absurd, especially considering you can get jelly sugar-free just as easily. Also, jam, too, has added sugar
So that argument is moot, it's like saying "jelly tastes like fruit"

Kevin: fruit HAS sugar
to add in refined sugar is defiling the fruit

Jillian: Okay, so jam defiles the fruit, too.

Kevin: saying that added refined cane sugar or corn syrup to a fruits natural glucose does not = jally tastes like fruit

Jillian: Jelly and jam = both have added sugar
You're arguing against jelly with a point that degrades jam as well
So now you're arguing against both jelly AND jam

Kevin: of course they do make shitty sugar jam but thats just as bad as jelly. TRUE jam stands above all

Jillian: Who is "they"? The different between jelly and jam = fruit bits.
That's it.
http://recipes.howstuffworks.com/question84.htm

Kevin: the richness of flavour that you get in a realy good jam could never be matched by jelly
its not just textural
jelly pretty much refers to low grade fruit spreads, its not just about bits of fruit
At a certain point in the quality scale as you climb it jelly stops showing up as a term because once it gets really good they will call it preserves or spread
jelly is a more loaded and specific term than i think was being acknowledged

Jillian: They do not change the name based on 'quality of texture or taste.' The definitions are pretty straightforward, and you're altering them based on personal, not objective, opinion.
The "loaded" term is merely the load of opinion you're spewing out

Kevin: there is a driving misunderstanding of this entire argument
b/c every argument is based of off misunderstandings ultimately
jillians terms : jam and jelly are the same only difference is fruit bits . my terms : jelly holds a specific place in the fruit spread tier and refers to lower quality spreads without fruit bits
a non fruit bit spread from like a boutique store won't be called jelly pretty much ever whereas smuckers or something will always say that

Jillian: Yes, it's an elitist definition, it's like a fancy chocolate store having a "truffle" but Hershey's just calling it a chocolate ball or something
It creates a certain impression, but not because of definitive quality

Kevin: exactly
truffle vs. chocolate ball
now we are talking

Kevin: only one last point
about the glass ceiling for quality
being generally capped for products that use certain terms
where as it is not as capped with other terms
this doesn't neccesitate any definite increase in quality
but the possibility is more open
hence my preference for the elitist term and the possibility of crazy flavor

Kevin: i want her closing statement, we resolved the conflict of terms. that's the best philosophical outcome. we are not fruit spread fascists trying to force or influence preference! merely seeing the field for all its positions clearly.

Jillian: I can't offer a closing statement, because his terminology is inaccurate, and I have no statement on it. If we were arguing over which is prettier, the sky or the grass, and I said, "well, for me, green is the prettiest color, and the sky is green, thus the sky is prettiest, what do you say?" How could he respond?

Kevin: i guess she is just rejecting my definition and doesn't want to respond on those terms. and yet it can't be argued that my definition doesn't exist societally b/c of the chocolate example.

If she wants to parse it out so that the only difference between jam and jelly is bits of fruit then i recognize that definition although I personally find it oversimplified and creates a problem in that there is now no way to differentiate quality from the terms. although that seemed to be her intention anyway to make quality of spread a different category entirely. from that definition its only a matter of preference for bits.

Best Deals in Fast Food

2008-09-10T09:59:00.000-07:00

Lately I’ve been low on cash. Pathetically low. Games cost money. Food also costs money. Hmmm, dilemma. And unfortunately, food is necessary to live, so I'll have to skip over games for a while. Yet, with my college years behind me, my lifetime quota for Instant Ramen has been reached. So I’m moving on up to a classier source of sustenance: fast food restaurants. Or at least their value menus; I'm not ready to too far into debt yet. I'll at least wait for grad school for that.

In recent months, we have entered a new era of fast food values. With gas prices on the rise and consumers eating out less, the fast food chains have been reorganizing their menus and slashing prices in the interest of luring in more patrons. So, I decided that I would try to do something for the good of the community and help educate other starving Americans on how to navigate this new age of fast food. So here are what I think are the five best deals in fast food these days.

(And keep in mind, although these deals are amazing, you're still going to be massively in debt if you eat them every day. This is for when you need cheap food on the go or you just can't stand the sight of your kitchen anymore.)

5. Wendy’s
Jr. Cheeseburger Deluxe Weight: 152 g Price: $ .99
153.53 grams/dollar
Deliciousness Rating: 7
Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger Weight 136g Price: $ .99
137.37 grams/dollar
Deliciousness Rating: 8
The Wendy’s value menu is the oldest and most unchanged, as far as fast food goes. As the West Virginia of value burgers, Wendy’s has revolved its menu around the big three items: Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger, Jr. Cheeseburger Deluxe and 5 Piece Chicken Tenders. Of the three, the Jr. Cheeseburger Deluxe has the best grams/dollar ratio. The Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger, which trades in pickles and onions for bacon is an excellent alternative to anyone who has a hankering for some pork or if they, like me, have a heavy allergic reaction to veggies. Since both of them have been priced at a dollar since the dawn of time, they offer an excellent option to any hungry consumer.

4. Jack in the Box
Big Cheeseburger: Weight: 212 g Price: $1.29
164.34 grams/dollar
Deliciousness rating: 7
The Big cheeseburger is the overlooked stepchild of the Jack in the Box Menu. A relatively recent addition to the Jack in the Box menu, it is oftentimes ignored for its smaller, cuter and cheaper siblings. Though the Big Cheeseburger is one of the more expensive items on the value menu, it definitely the best value. It dominates over the Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger which weighed in at 126 grams/dollar. Like all Jack in the Box burgers, be prepared for some extra mayonnaise. By the end of the solid slab of meat, bun, cheese and mayonnaise, I daresay that most any consumer should have their hunger more than satiated. Whereas occasionally it takes 2 lesser burgers to meet my needs, the trusty Big Cheeseburger gets the job done on the first try.

3. McDonalds
Double Cheeseburger: Weight: 165 g Price: $1.00
165 grams/dollar.
Deliciousness rating: 8
I’ve never been a big fan of McDonalds. I only chose to eat there during their 29 cent hamburger and 39 cent cheeseburger craze. Their Big Mac and Quarter Pounder Burgers were much too expensive, had a high carb:meat ratio and the fancy paper packaging made me feel inadequate. Luckily, the Double Cheeseburger came along and I fell in love again. Two patties, two slices of cheese. What else could you need? Coming in at the low cost of $1, it is a welcome alternative to McDonald’s only other low priced sandwich option: the McChicken, which scored 147 grams/dollar.

2. Taco Bell
Cheesy Double Beef Burrito: Weight:227 g Price: $.89
255.06 grams/dollar
Delicousness Rating: 7
Taco Bell has radically slashed its prices in recent weeks, leading to their menus looking like they were made in the 90s. Though all of the items on the value menu are less than a dollar, they mostly comprise of snacks like cinnamon twists, nachos and basic tacos. The real diamond in the rough here is the Cheesy Double Beef Burrito. There are no frills here, just straight up beef and cheese. At a price tag of 89 cents, the Cheesy Double Beef Burrito definitely takes the prize as best value. The taste is nothing to scoff at either.

1.Subway
Meatball Marinara Footlong: (Including wheat bread, lettuce, tomatoes, onions, green peppers, pickles, olives and cheese.)
Weight: 754 Price: $5.00
150.8 grams/cent
Deliciousness Rating: 9
I’ve discussed with my friends that this is the event to tell our grandchildren. It is comparable to the tales of our own parents and their tales of buying two horses and a buggy with a nickel. “In summer 2008, right before Emperor McCain I ruined our country a restaurant called Subway revolutionized the sandwich industry and fed a nation. Lines were out the door daily whenever noon came for hungry crowds wanting Five Dollar Footlongs. They were magnificent. You could choose from over a dozen different varieties, but one stood out from the crowd. The Meatball Marinara the best value and was a warm and filling meal. However, and it was limited time only, and when it ended, there was a great uproar in the streets caused by the tears in our stomach.” Okay, so it's a bit overdramatic, I know. Still, Subway offers size meals for great prices. As an added bonus, they’re customizable so you have unrivaled variety. But, enjoy it while it lasts, because it is limited time only (supposedly).